


Knock Knock

by Ifeelwitchcraftuponme



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005), Torchwood
Genre: Multiple Masters, Nefarious plan gone wrong, Non canon interaction, TARDIS - Freeform, Trapped In Elevator, homoerotic tension
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-19
Updated: 2020-04-19
Packaged: 2021-03-01 20:40:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,859
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23733223
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ifeelwitchcraftuponme/pseuds/Ifeelwitchcraftuponme
Summary: They all have different motives, they all have different morals, but they accidently make the same mistake on the same day. What will happen when Two masters, a professor and a captain get trapped in a TARDIS…
Relationships: Missy & River Song, Missy/River Song, The Doctor/Jack Harkness, The Doctor/River Song, The Doctor/The Master (Doctor Who)
Comments: 5
Kudos: 14





	Knock Knock

**Author's Note:**

> Not sure if I’m doing them Justice but I love writing for Missy.

####  Knock Knock.

They all have different motives, they all have different morals, but they accidently make the same mistake on the same day. What will happen when Two masters, a professor and a captain get trapped in a TARDIS…

Missy was starting to enjoy being free from the vault. It had so far only been for three hours, and she had spent most of it on a train, but she didn't mind, she had already cleared the train car with a patented method combining threats and disintegration, and was now enjoying the silence, perfect for plotting with oneself.

Herself was currently sitting opposite her, in what had once been a first class seat, sipping tea or possibly something stronger from a thermos, he had been the one to break her out.

Not that she hadn't already been planning to do so, the fact the plan had worked was by far down to her supreme pre-planning, the Doctor or his eggy little friend would never notice that she was gone.

It wasn't like she had anything better to do, down it that nasty vault. She had been building an escape plan out of bits and pieces from her requests, those small mercies.

A recording device loaded with enough parts of her just existing inside the vault, a good excuse to go quiet had come easily to her; after a particularly annoying ethical debate with the Doctor, she was really starting to dislike this new snotty teacher-like air he had about him, it reminded her far to much of her time at the academy, but the university grounds must have been making a mark on him. 

After a fight like that he should have been surprised if he heard anything other than the annoying and slightly eerie fairground tunes Missy had learnt for that exact reasoning.

All she had needed after that was an actual way to escape, she had been deep in a planning session somewhere between digging out with a spoon and just going full Dalek and exterminating the entire region of Bristol just for her sweet revenge. 

But then her escape found her instead, she had been delighted to hear a new voice, it was a great opportunity to make a friend and gradually drive them insane, fortunately there was no need. 

After she herself, was already quite mad.

He seemed to agree on that, and he was more than happy to let her out, there was an angry fire in his eyes and a greyness around his temples, it was all quite familiar, the angry-ness at least, if there was one falling Missy could point out about her own radiant being, would be her pechance for a poor memory, especially when about her own faces, or even meeting herself, what could she say, something about living several lives as a rotting corpse really put one off keeping track of one's own appearance.

Not that she didn't care about her appearance, after all, presentation is so very important, it makes the truly evil stand above the down right borning. Thankfully the trait seemed to be shared, not a sign of hoodies or tracksuit bottoms anywhere, in fact they matched, both in delightful shades of violet and plum, Missy had been delighted, her fashion taste was continually excellent no matter what the Doctor said.

Now they watched each other across the train, he had told her all about spending 70ish years trapped on earth after the Doctor confiscated his TARDIS, but he was less than willing to tell her how he knew where she was, or even which regeneration he was, to be fair Missy didn’t really know which one she was, years of being evil and being driven insane by a constant drumming made sure that pretty much most of her lives blended together, being beaten by the Doctor, killing some of his squishy little friends, etcetera etcetera. With a couple of good clear memories mixed in, such as turning the entire world into her wonderful self, and running a maths teacher over with a milk float.

You know the good stuff.

If he was her though she really couldn’t tell if it was a downgrade, he didn’t look too bad -even if really amped up the feral-ness- and she couldn't say she disagreed with the facial hair, it was hard to beat a classical villainous facial hair look.

The plan was simple, ambush the Doctor at the sight of the rift, something Missy was quite familiar with, as was her male counterpart. 

Together they had put their maddened genius together and spent an hour or so calculating the optimal time for the Doctor’s reappearance.

Thankfully there was one soon, something they both had suspected despite not telling each other, after all who would the Master be if they trusted themselves.

Then they would wait for the TARDIS to materialise, if the Doctor left they would easily break in, they both had their expertise in breaking and entering even if they weren’t sure how to yet.

If the Doctor remained inside it would be a more difficult maneuver, not that either one of them would mind a good vent of stress in the form of extreme violence directed towards the Doctor.

Then they would be free to relocate their respective TARDISES and return to causing whatever havoc they wanted, and fondly go their own ways, perhaps exchanging numbers if they felt like going on a murderous night out.

Currently heading to Cardiff, the Master was happy for his opportunity to use his constantly inferno-like fury to empty a train carriage, he was planning this to be a solo venture before becoming trapped on earth and having to dig in the infernal knowledge he had gained from the Gallifreyan matrix, it had been an infuriating 70 years for the poor Spy Master and he wanted to make sure his victory was both as magnificent and as destructive as possible. The answer was simple, two heads are better than one, especially if both have a long standing grudge against the Doctor. In the Doctor's records he had not only seen the version called Missy, who currently sat opposite him picking her fingernails with a ornate dagger, but he had also seen a third version of himself at this precise moment in the United Kingdom, but something about ‘Harold Saxon’ made him disinclined to trust him. Obviously not that he trusted Missy.

If he had to give her up to save himself he wouldn't hesitate.

No question.

He was the Master afterall.

He couldn't wait to make the Doctor suffer the same fate he had, he didn't even care if it was the insufferable little blonde one they caught, any version of the doctor would make an excellent victim at this point, he thought stroking his beard. 

“ _ Train approaching Cardiff, Train approaching Cardiff, please change here, this is the final stop for trainli- .” _ the tannoy cut off immediately as Missy aimed at it with her sonic-umbrella, 

“I had an assistant who sounded like that once,” she said, “I had to disintegrate him. He was almost as annoying as these Autons, Do you remember those?” unfortunately the Master did, it wasn't exactly his greatest escapade, he had been having to work with plastic daffodils after all. Out of all the beings he had worked with he had hoped the Kasaavin would have been the best, but he hadn't really had many particularly good ones to contest that experience.

The train pulled into the Cardiff station without much ceremony, with the Master and Missy exiting the train, breezing past concerned policemen and a particularly terrorfied ticket collector, Missy making sure to flash him her favourite patented evil smile. 

Before stepping foot into what they hoped would be the place of what could be one of their most memorable adventures.

Cardiff was the city of Captain Jack Harkness, someone both Missy and the Master had neglected to pay any attention to, as far as they cared he was just another squishable friend, they couldn’t have been more wrong.

The Captain had been watching over the city of Cardiff from above when they arrived, he as usual had had a morning of chasing Weevils and hunting down a minor alien artifact. Now he stood on his favourite vantage point watching over the city like a square jawed gargoyle,

If he was a king then this part of wales was his kingdom, if the saw the couple in matching purple, who parted the crowds like the sea before them, police people following them before seeming to forget what they were doing and return to the crowds as they strode purposely arm in arm towards the bay, he paid them no attention, until it was too late.

Missy and the Master stood at the base of the Water Tower sculpture, Missy scanning it, parasol raised, the Master just kicking pebbles at it, and jumping up and down on the loose paving slabs as if hoping to trigger a secret entrance.

The dark haired spymaster scratched his beard and checked his watch, it would be anytime now, both he and his female version sharing an annoyed look, and put their heads together to whisper conspiratorially. That, Jack noticed, two suspicious figures both clearly looking out of time, poking around the opening of Torchwood three’s entrances, one of whomst seemed to have a sonic device of her own.

It made Jack’s heat race, perhaps the Doctor hadn't forgotten him after all.

Except he definitely had, the Doctor was late, and The Master was not enjoying it, that would be something he would add to his imaginary list of the Doctor’s crimes which he would take out on them in his twisted little dreams. Patience very much so used up he fired his disintegrator directly at where he knew the rift was, the blast disappeared over their heads, the rift visible for a few seconds as it grumbled away above them.

“Ah,” said Missy “That could work.”

And aimed her parasol up, together they held the rift open, the ground and sky shaking, but it had the desired effect, as the rift shook and tried to close only to spit out a small blue box from its depths. From wherever the TARDIS had been it was pulled to modern day Cardiff.

Seeing this Missy’s eyes went wide, realistically she was not expecting to to work. Grabbing the Master by his coat she dragged him into the shadows of the nearby buildings, trying to dissolve into the worried crowds. Both versions of the Master now holding newspapers in front of their faces, as an attempt to look less suspicious that failed greatly. 

Not that the Doctor seemed to notice.

He strode out of his TARDIS without a single spot of doubt or worry, his companion following him like a lost puppy.

From the growling noise emanating from behind her other self’s newspaper, he had taken a good look and it definitely wasn't his Doctor, Missy lowered her paper grinding her teeth, from the look of the retreating grey hair, it may have been her’s. Not that it mattered in the end. She would get her sweet, sweet revenge eventually.

Whatever the Doctor and his companion seemed to think had happened, it didn't bother them in the slightest.

They happily strolled away into Cardiff looking for something interesting to waste their time on whilst the TARDIS appeared to refuel, not that anything on this blasted rock could be more interesting than anywhere else in the universe though Missy, but the Doctor was always a sentimental fool, and today it played right into their nefarious hands.

They dropped their newspapers, littering was evil after all, and looked both ways before strolling over to the TARDIS, arm in arm, Missy felt like skipping, so she did.

The master faux bowed before the TARDIS door, an evil smile all over his face, “ladies first?”

“Of course  _ darling _ .” She replied, before grabbing the TARDIS doors and attempting to shove them open.

Nothing happened.

“Move let me try,” The Master sized up the TARDIS, “ok you piece of crap type fourty, let me in.” then slammed it with all of his body weight.

Nothing moved.

Missy shoved him aside, “try it with more threats, you hear that? I'll shred you then dump you into the untempered schism if you don't open right this second.” but the doors remained locked, she kicked the doors wildy.

“Would it work if we both tried?” But Missy just ignored the Master's comment, only to respond by the way of a rude gesture, and by blowing a twist of curly hair out of her face.

All of this Jack saw, he had rushed down from his roof top position to see the two of them standing in front of the newly appeared TARDIS, he watched them carelessly from a distance, thinking of a good entrance line, before he realised they they had begun to i turn threaten and sonic the doors of the TARDIS.

That made it clear to Jack, this was definitely not the Doctor, he had just wasted ten minutes trying to come up with a clever comment on being abandoned in Cardiff in the 21st century, and after all that they were probably just weird tourists, or something.

Then the doors swing open, causing the pair of them to fall face first into the TARDIS, that got Jack’s attention, as far as he knew nothing could get into the TARDIS unless she wanted it to. These were obviously not tourists.

They definitely weren't, as Missy got to her feet brushing off her skirts, sneering at the interior of the TARDIS, though internally she didn't hate it, it was a good mix of dark brooding atmosphere, and just random touches, like the electric guitar, and the black board that the Master was currently writing something rude on. As she strutted over to the controls, there came knocking on the doors, they exchanged suspicious looks, and Missy pulled her emergency disintegration device out of one of her hidden pockets.

The knocking continued.

With a flourish she pulled the doors open, coming face to face with the Captain.

“Not today thank you!” she trilled offloading the disintegrator into his chest.

The man fell backwards definitely dead, as she let the doors close behind her

“Who was that dear?”

“No idea, not a problem now though, are we ready to go?”

“Any moment now,” called the Master, sounding far happier than he ever had in the several hours Missy had known him, and possibly far more than he ever actually had. Missy slid down the railing towards the consol, and began to flip switches and input coordinates, the two Masters working together in harmony.

Then there was a noise, a noise that they were both dreading.

The sound of a key in the lock.

They both froze, unsure wheather to run, hide or play dumb.

But the figure who opened the door was no Doctor.

Professor River Song had only been on earth about twenty minutes and she was bored. She had got down to the planet's survce via vortex manipulator, but the vehicle she required was a little more complicated than the vortex manipulator, and she did exactly what she needed. She could just borrow the TARDIS, it was nothing unusual for her, her scans picked up the location, she would just teleport down to it, and then use it for whatever complicated mission she needed a higher quality machine rather than the cheap and nasty vortex manipulator. And whenever she was done, she'd just pop it down when and wherever she had found it. 

It was a fool proof method, she had borrowed multiple different versions of the TARDIS but the Doctor had never noticed, the TARDIS wasn't one for telling on her anyway.

But here she was, 21st century Cardiff, nowhere important as far as River could tell or cared. As she turned the corner there was the TARDIS just where her scanners said it would be, the Doctor nowhere in sight.

The only unusual thing seemed to be the man collapsing in front of the TARDIS, but as she approached he seemed to come to, she watched as he unsteadily got to his feet. She used this as an opportunity to get in close to the TARDIS doors and place her key in the lock, she struggled for a moment, the TARDIS apparently being somewhat hesitant about letting her in for once. 

She heard the lock give the same time she heard the engines begin to go, she released the strange collapsing man was right behind her, but for a moment she didn't care who he was, he could be the Doctor or a companion for all she cared, she did not want to get stuck in the vortex attached to the ide of the TARDIS it sounded unpleasant, pushing the door open before it could dematerialise. 

The man toppled in behind her.

The doors closed behind them with a click.

Effectively locking them inside, as they entered the endless void of time and space.

Trapping them all together.

  
  



End file.
